Monthly Archives: January 2009

… And it is in

Well, I’m quite happily sitting in my living room on my new lappy. I picked it up yesterday after work (without freezing!) and our friend Trevor set up the wireless internet for us last night.

I haven’t really been up to anything too exciting lately. I am very pleased that I haven’t had any terrible reaction to my latest medication yet, which means that it is the first weekend in about 3 or 4 weeks where I haven’t spent the majority of it lying on the couch watching seasons of Law and Order SVU.

One of my friends held a “girls night in” type event last night where we got to try out various spa products. It was quite interesting, but I have to say that it is a lot nicer to have someone else do things for you, but then you get what you pay for. We ended up watching “House Bunny“, which was considerably better than I thought it would be. It tried to channel Legally Blonde, but nothing quite beats a ditz going to Harvard. It was pretty cute and left you feeling somewhat happy afterwards.

Anyone seen any good movies lately?


Filed under Life

4am Ramblings

Yes, unfortunately it is 4 am in the morning. I woke up after a bizarre dream at about 3 and haven’t been able to get back to sleep since. So, I thought that I would come and write some random things (hopefully) for your reading enjoyment. Or at least have a semi-good rant to get some things off my chest.

Theoretically my new lappy is going to be in today. I’m not really keeping my hopes up after my other previous experience.

I’ve determined that any type of sleeping medication and myself = very bad day. For example, this weekend I took the latest medicinal attempt to get me to sleep and I ended up almost fainting, with extreme low blood pressure (ie. I couldn’t get out of bed without pretty much collapsing) and the stomach flu. So I guess that means that I’m going to have to find other ways to make myself relax and sleep. Any suggestions?

I have also determined that I want to be heard and held, not fixed. That does mean that it’s going to be a painful next while and I deal through emotions and events. But I guess it’s worth it to find out who you are and to actually live instead of just survive.

I guess one of the main thing that is bothering me at this moment (except perhaps that I’m dealing with a lot of denied and repression emotions) is that I’m having to do this presentation to potential future interns about why they should want to work at my work. I’m finding it really difficult because my experience at my work hasn’t been the best and so any positive experience is seemingly a lie. I do understand that other people do and can really enjoy working there, I just don’t. My counselor suggested just to fake it, which I’m usually quite proficient at doing, but this time it just seems to hard. It’s easy enough to lie to one or two people but what about 20 or 30? And then you have to keep up the lie. But on the other hand, I do want to give my work a good review as other people could find it really rewarding and I want to keep my job.

It probably doesn’t help that all I can think about when I’m brainstorming for this presentation is the President of the company asking me after my final presentation why I don’t want to come back and work for this company. (I don’t know if he will, but I’m pretty sure that he asked one of last year’s intern’s that when she didn’t decide to come back.) What would I say? “Yes, Mr. President of Company, I became severely depressed while working here and I’d really love to relive that whole experience in a year from now!” I think I do a good enough job of putting myself through mental torture and I don’t need that again. Ugh.

So, does anyone have any suggestions on how to fake my way through this presentation without turning into (more of) a basket case? Any help is greatly appreciated.


Filed under Life, Thoughts

Guess What Didn’t Come in the Mail?

You’ve guessed right. My new lappy. Alas. Dell was supposed to email me if it wasn’t shipped and they didn’t and purolator couldn’t get a case and a USB key to the nearest store to my house for 4 days. Needless, I’m not too impressed, but it’ll arrive soon. (It better… or grumble.)

But enough complaining, for I have a confession to make. I am a closet Abba fan. Ever since I was looking through my parent’s record collection as a preteen and seeing the Abba boots* and taking a listen, I was hooked.

When I was in Berlin before my 17th Birthday during my exchange, we went to a karaoke bar and guess what we sang? Dancing Queen. So it seemed fitting that Mr. Bean got me Mamma Mia for Christmas. Since then, I’ve been hitting up You Tube listening to various songs. I really should just go out and get a CD.

Apparently I’m not the only one in my family who is an Abba fan. My mum usually plays hockey with a bunch of women twice a week and every year before Christmas they have a 3 on 3 tournament where they all dress up according to a certain theme. This year’s theme was the 70s and she decided to go as one of the ladies from Abba. Unfortunately, she was having problems with her neck and was unable to go, but the ladies gave her a CD which was a compilation of all the ladies’ favourite 70s songs. Guess what song my mum chose? Gimme, Gimme, Gimme (a man after midnight). We were listening to the CD as we made dinner the other night and when it came on, both my mum and I danced around the kitchen, much to Mr. Bean’s amusement. Yes, we’re just that cool. Not quite as cool as these people, though:

What are some of your not-so-secret favourite things?

*Abba boots are the huge boots that the guys (and girls) of Abba would wear. Check out those bad boys:


Filed under Thoughts

Guess What’s Coming in the Mail Today?

One of these babies in black:


Hopefully this’ll mean more frequent updates in blogging, for then I don’t need to sit in the basement to go on the computer!

I’m quite excited for my new lappy! Maybe it’ll even rival Strongbad’s.

PS. If you have time, check out Dragon – it’s one of my favourite Strongbad emails.


Filed under Life

The resident insomniac is in.

That’s right! I didn’t fall asleep until about 9 this morning and slept wretchedly for about 4 hours. Bleh.

I also want to apologize for my absence around here – it seems somewhat of a monkey wrench has been thrown in my life. It’s hard to do anything when your brain chemistry is …interesting.

I was sleeping a bit better (ironically after trying and getting off of sleeping pills) but last night I just couldn’t sleep. Ever had your brain just not calm down enough to lie still? Or the desire to cry once your head hits the pillow. Yeah, not fun.

What excitement is happening in everyone elses lives?


Filed under Life